Time for an Attitude Change

The Winter of LIFE Is Not for Sissys it is however a time for refletion and personal growth. WE all have some things about ourselves that we need to examine, i am sharing mine to encourage others to look at thiers, not necessarily share but to ponder. Over the course of years we have all developed habits of LIfe and I have been taing stock of some of mine. I went through a period of time when, depresion seemed to rule my life and I was a truly mean girl. I felt life was unfair, i didn't understand why "everyone" else had it better. Better everything! I was unable to see clearly that my choices, and actions were based on what i don't know but i had a very sharp tongue and negativity ruled my heart. I didn't like me and was totally convinced I was unworthy , a failure. I hid my negative self thougths with hurtful words. I had therapy, time and hard work to correct that.today i have a grateful heart. I see the glass as half full or better. I LIKE me, although it remains a struggle and self doubt or second guessing will probebly always remain. Now I problem solve these thoguhts and do understand that I try tp make thoughtful decisions based on what i know at the time and how they will produce a positive outcome. During my darkest times, many times I felt God had passed me by because i was so bad. My own guild fueling this thought. one day I just knew I was not alone and forwhatever reason I was able to pray again. I found a new peace and know that we all have the tools to change. God has provide therapists, medications and friends to have our backs. Now my present thinking is that while I still have guilt over things I did which were mean or out of line, i cannever really change those long ago actions, my job today is to move on, living in the Way, an doing the best as I can. Past actions can be regretted, but should not consume us because we acted then in a way that was all that we could do. If I encounter someone from this time I will certainly try to make amends, but even today as I make decisions about my actions I know I WILL still make mistakes. The difference is that today my motivation and thought process is based on Faith and a belief that with prayerful thought i will make good choices. Today my challenge it to continue to look for kindness, distrubute it and keep praying for the right choices. The WInter of Life is not for Sissys but a time to keep growing!